How a film poster should look.
Regular dental checkups and a pony for everyone!
Appearing at the Lesser-Known Democratic Candidates Forum hosted by the New Hampshire Institute of Politics, dark horse presidential candidate Vermin Supreme outlined key policy proposals including mandatory good oral hygiene, zombies as a potential energy source and a pony for every American.
Debt ceiling commentary in rap form. I hope you’re taking notes NPR…
This is the stuff early 80’s low-fi hip-hop dreams are made of.
Harry Potter In A Minute, As Re-Enacted By Cats
A note on undergarments
When a lady puts on a dress that’s just a tad too sheer, she may wear a slip underneath so as not to reveal the contours of her nether-regions. On the subject of ladylike unmentionables, here are several things to keep in mind:
Rule #1 It is important that a lady take care in selecting undergarments that properly fit the waist, lest she find herself with a pair of lace-edged burgundy silk Trina Turk shorts tangled around her knees after running across the intersection of Connecticuit Ave. and M St. on a Wednesday morning.
Rule #2 True to their name, undergarments are worn underneath the clothes and are not meant to be seen (at least not in a professional setting - stylish evening attire and the boudoir are another matter). But just because they’re hidden from view, doesn’t mean your undies shouldn’t be stylish. After all, one of the fun parts of being a woman is knowing how hot you look underneath your clothes; for all we know Ruth Bader Ginsburg has a certain spring in her step because she’s wearing a lace teddy under her Supreme Court Robe. At any rate, wearing attractive undergarments will at least slightly diminish your embarrassment should you find yourself in a busy intersection near Dupont circle with your slip somewhere between the hem of a trench coat and the top of your wellington’s.
The Qaddafis v. The Bluths
Check out this awesome comparison of the two famously dysfunctional families from The New Republic.
This week in rhinestone-studded House reps: Frederica Wilson
Politics are never lackluster when Rep. Frederica Wilson (D-Fla.) is around. This sequined sartorialist hails from Florida’s 17th district, which covers the northeastern portion of Miami-Dade county. After serving 12 years in the Florida state legislature, she plans to use her political clout to tackle education and criminal justice reform as a newly elected member of the 112th Congress (2011-12). And I’m guessing this sassy sistah can show the pleated pant-wearers of Capital Hill a thing or two about fashion as well. You go girl.
This week in hilarious animal videos: the honey badger
You can find more sassy homosexual animal video voiceover action here.
Spring 2011 Trend Report: the Hiring Freeze is the New Black
It’s official folks! The hiring freeze is the new black. Vogue’s Spring issue may be pedaling coral accents, high-waisted bellbottoms, and cat-eye sunglasses, but your intrepid reporter here at StuffThingsJunk can tell you that no matter what you’re wearing, nobody will hire you. Yep, the economy may be on the upswing but the hiring freezes that rocked runways (and by “runway” I mean your route to the unemployment office) in Fall of 2008 is a trend that’s still going strong in Spring of 2011.
I wouldn’t hold out hope for a sartorial shift come Summer either. Memorial Day through Labor Day isn’t just for wearing white, it’s also for hiring interns (cheap sluts!). And by “hire” I mean not-pay some eager beaver college student to do stuff you, a degree-having professional, might otherwise get paid to do while angling for a job more suited to your super fabulous skills.
But don’t put your interview suit in storage just yet! Word on (Wall) street is that employment prospects may be looking up this Fall. For now, stay strong. And don’t let anyone tell you that a self-respecting recesionista can’t shop at Forever 21.
In photos: awkward presidential encounters
Check out Slate’s slideshow of awkward presidential moments, including Bush’s hand-holding tryst with Crown Prince Abdullah and Nixon’s unexpected embrace with Sammy Davis Jr.
